Where to begin. In one of our rare attempts to fit in with the Columbia academics, Lizzy Bumpo and I decided to venture down Amsterdam to the Hungarian (what cool people call it). Obviously the result was an action packed adventure.
First, because Elizabeth and I can have awkward encounters even when we're not actually stalking people, we ran into my music theory professor, Jimbo*. And because we're both in that new zodiac sign that like doesn't actually exist, we saw him at that moment when I was busy defogging my glasses and Elizabeth was contemplating the tiramisu. He was just a smidgen awkward, but when he smiled, a thousand angels vomited on his face (™Lizzy Bumpo), and all was right with the world.
Then things went downhill, after the definitely non-Slut List strumpet waitress forgot Elizabeth's drink order, and then made her feel like someone slapped her in the face (™Natty Bumpo). Even worse was the man sitting next to our table, whose glasses strap thing resembled a rat tail (widely known as the most despicable of hair fashions).
The central topic of our conversation was the men in our lives (namely music professors) which was not earning us many friends in the elite environment that we were in... but as any Slut List member would know, they were just majorly jealz of how pretty and awkward we are. Soon after we mentioned/Facebook stalked another music theory professor (I told you) though, we spotted a look alike! Quelle surprise!
Although we originally went to the Hungarian to find hot guys (we're pretty bad at that, obviously...), the only potential suitor was too busy with his phone to give us a second look. Story of our lives... Sigh. :O<<<<<
Then some weird guys with accents sat next to us, so we left - but all in all the evening was a success - no alarmingly awkward encounters, really. That's all we can hope for.
Slut List 4 lyfe (as Snoop would say),
Lizzy + Natty Bumpo
*Names have been changed to protect the awkward.